2017, thanks for the lessons

When 2017 began I was panicking. I knew I was moving to Germany in August and wanted to have everything under control. I started applying for jobs with the hope of having “everything under control” by then. Back then, little did I know that applying for a job in Germany was a job itself. I got frustrated and just stopped applying. I was investing too much time thinking about the future and not enjoying the present. I was going to leave Panama in 8 months so  decided to adjust my energy and invest it in enjoying my time with family and friends. The family and friends that I was probably not going to see for a long time just on the screen of my phone.

Getting prepared to leave Panama wasn’t an easy ride. As my departure got closer and closer, I started feeling scared. The decision was just setting in. It is hard to let go of things that you don’t really want to leave behind. I loved my job, felt very sad to leave my mom alone, had made new friends with whom I would have loved to spend more time and a promising small business but I had to leave. The other founder of my own family, Viktor, was in Hamburg and the time had arrived for us to finally be together.

Nothing could have prepared me for these four months. They have been quite a ride but they have also taught me that I am more lucky than I realised. They taught me how to appreciate the little things in life. That my mom, wherever it is that I am will always be my biggest supporter. That being married is not easy but that when you have by your side a person that supports, takes care and lifts you up in your worst date, it’s worth the job. That your true friends will always be there for you, it doesn’t matter that you live on the other side of the world.

Life is not easy, that you may already know but I do believe that what helped me go through these tough times was staying positive. I had days in which I gave myself permission to feel sad and not see the bright side but that was it. The day after, I would turn these feelings into fuel and just kept moving forward but the biggest lesson that this year left for me is that I am stronger than what I believed. That my sacrifices and the hard work will be worth it and that if I stay persistent my dreams will become true.

Here I am, on the last Friday of 2017, feeling happy because we’ll spent New Year with our new friends. I’ll begin my professional path in Hamburg next Tuesday and I have already booked two trips for 2018.

My wish for you, you that take the time every now and then to read my thoughts. In 2018, please:

Be kind to yourself.

May your life be filled with good energy and good intentions.

May you stay healthy.

May you work hard to reach your dreams and goals.

From my side, I’ll still be here weekly, sharing with you my life in Germany. I am already thinking on some things that I would like to improve within the blog so stay tuned for that.

I wish you a healthy and enriching 2018.

With love,

Izmir

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